Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #10: The greener grass in the village!

“I will miss you, so much,” I whispered to Stella’s ear as I held her close.

“I will miss you too hon…But remember you promised to come visit me over the holiday,” Stella whispered back.

“Mzeiya gari inataka kuondoka,” the tout shouted.

“I will call daily and I will visit you!” I kissed her cheek then released her.

I wondered how I was going to endure two months in Stella’s absence. Just the other day, we had parted all night, threw caution to the wind and imagined that were the only ones in the world! As the Matatu navigated the corners, I wiped a tear that trickled down my cheek.

Even as I boarded a Matatu to the Great Rift, I felt nervous. It was time to face the man who pays for the damn thing; my dad. My dad was one person whom you could lie to on phone but not face to face. To make it worse he could just let you lie and lie until you entangle yourself in your own lies. The only solace was that there was no report card to take home! As I stepped on our gate, the dogs backed, clearly forgetting who I was!

“Come one Simba! Hey Rain! You are back!” Wesley, our shamba boy could not hide his joy. He shook my hand, almost breaking it.

“So how is the city?” that was a way of asking what I had brought him. I handed him a pair of jeans and his yellowed dental formula was all out.

“Thank you so much!”

“You are welcome.” I said as I handed him my luggage.

“You see Ann, that woman who lives next to the church? She gave birth to twins but the kids are dissimilar to her husband, I keep telling people that she separated her legs for that white missionary!”

At that point I knew he was beginning his cumulative updates and even though I was tired I heard to listen. “Dan died too last month, he was too old. Did you hear that Simon too died? No? Well people suspect that it was ulcers but I think it’s mdudu! Ever since he kept bringing different women to his house I knew he was courting trouble.” Wesley continued with his chatter at which point I lost him.

He was one person who duty was to bring me up to speed with every development. “Your dad did sell that goat…blah blah” until he mentioned a name. “You remember Emma?” Wesley said holding my shirt.

“Emma? Is she still in school?”

“No she completed form four and she has been asking for you. She wants to come to the city. And by the way she has grown very pretty!” Wesley winked at me knowing well that last statement would ignite my interest.

A few minutes latter I was seated on our patio, sipping a glass of milk, when Emma gently pushed our gate. Our veranda was in such a position that you can see someone from the gate walking to the house. She surely had grown beautiful. Her full figure was complemented by her attire and as she walked to the main house, her butt wiggled and swung in rhythm and in sync.

“Emma! Welcome long time no see! You look beautiful! Your mother must be treating you so well,” I enthused as I engulfed her in a bear hug I felt her immense energy. She had learnt to hug so tightly!

“Rain, it is good to see you after all this time! How is Nairobi?”

“Nothing much, just masomo! It never ends!”

Boy isn’t amazing how girls grow. It was just the other day, when Emma was just a confused pimpled faced teenager, roughing boys and throwing insult at any of them that looked her direction, but now my eyes were all over again. And now I was running up and down thinking what to offer her. Then I unloaded my package of the latest DVDs at least that would give me a reason to visit her. The unfortunate person was my cousin whom the DVDs were destined for in the first place!

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #11: Treading on a military ground!

A sunny Saturday afternoon saw me hesitating behind the red painted gate. I knew her parents would not be at home but then just incase the meeting failed then probably they would be at my case. My weak reason of collecting my DVDs would be probably save my ass.

The gate was open so I pushed it and walked slowly, to the main house. I was a few metres from the main house when Emma came out from the kitchen, a coy smile planted on her lips. She glowed in her print dress.

“Hi,” she said as I engulfed myself in her hug.

“I am good, you look good.”

“Thanks. Well here I am. Mum just left and it’s only me and the house help. Dad as you know is quite rare to see him around. He just appears when least expected,” She paused for a while as the last statement sent a chill down my spine. “Welcome in,” she motioned me to the door that stood adjoined to my position.

“I loved those DVDs..especially how I met your mother. I love that Barney character..even though he is a womanizer and he is stinking rich!”

“Yap, that guy is irresistible! Anyway how have you been?”

“Just watching the comedies and helping in the house work. I also want to come to Nairobi and study Nursing,”

“Oh you want to be a nurse? Nurses make good mothers!”

“I wanna go for it! What drink can I get you?”

“Chang’aa, would do,” I quipped leisurely then studied her bewildered face. “Just kidding, give me a glass of water.”

“Have a look at this photo album, I will be back,” she said after handing me a glass of water. Emma’s family comprised of three boys and Emma. She was the first born and the rest of her siblings were in primary school. Most of her photos were those while in high school. There were few photos of her mother and sibling but the image of her father immediately sparkled my interest.

Her towering dad in an imposing military outfit sent an all too familiar unwritten warning to me. He was in the army and was reputed with knocking off jaws of people he differed with. In our cigarette and Chang’aa laden village, he never trusted any young man near his only daughter. They were all the same; trying to get into her pants then sprint away in case she fell pregnant, he reasoned.

Half an hour later Emma appeared in a butt moulding jeans and a white t-shirt imprinted with the country’s flag. The clothing sensually curved out her full figure to an exquisite being.

“Did you recognize everyone in the album?”

“No, but that is not of interest now, I wish I had a camera here, I would take you a picture that would put be unforgettable!” She moved her index finger on my forehead to indicate that I was naughty. But in that move I sensed courage.

At that point my phone rung. “Let me take this,” I said as I walked out noticing that it was my girlfriend Stella on the line. “Hey, how are you?”

“It’s Hon..baby, why did you sound plain?” Stella’s voice came through from the earpiece. “Well I am with my Dad…Will call you later.” She hung the line without further conversation.

“Don’t worry a classmate finding out how holiday is,” I informed Emma as I walked back in. “How is it?” she inquired staring at me and expecting an honest answer.

“I am in the best company my dear, what better way to enjoy the holiday?” She just smiled. It was some minutes to seven and the sun had already set. I knew her mother would come in anytime. Some day I would have the audacity of facing her face to face but not today. Emma saw me off to the gate.

Just outside the gate she could not go further. We stood face to face saying unending bye byes. The crescent moonlight provided partial light that made her eyes glow like a star. I held her in one long hug, and then moved my hands to hold her back. I did not want to leave her…as I held her hand for one other minute, our serene moment was disrupted by the sound of a fast approaching car; a land rover.

“I gotta go, now” I whispered out.

“You’re right, it’s him!” With that she quickly headed for the gate as sought a different route home.

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #12: Court Martial!

The sound of a roaring landrover, woke me up. It was 8 o’clock and the military man was already in the compound. I peered through the window and after parking his earth mover, he went straight to my dad who was outside taking his breakfast.

“Rain, you are in trouble! Dad wants to see you!” Wesley shouted knocking at my door.

“Go away, tell him I will come,” I said as I lazily put on my boxers and my trousers. I headed first to the kitchen to take breakfast. I was buying time so that my dad could calm down the irate Army Man.

“Rainmaker! Come over here!” My dad shouted his lungs out. He was angry, I could tell from his tone. I strolled slowly towards the two. Emma’s dad was in tight t-shirt that exaggerated his biceps and well built torso. He wore military trousers and combat boots; uh scary! I stretched out my hand for a handshake but he shoved it away.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” my dad yelled out.

“What are you talking about?” I played innocence.

“First I asked you to be here, but you have been wasting my time!”

“Well…I…” I stammered with nothing to say in my defense.

Emma’s dad heavy breathing scared me, but I felt a little consolation in my dad’s presence. He had not uttered a word and I did not know what was going in his mind; he just kept breathing like an overburdened bull.

“What were you doing with Timon’s daughter?” my dad’s glare was on me.

“Yes, what do you want from my daughter?” Timon held me by my shoulder, and it hurt very much.

“Nothing, just catching up..” my voice was barely audible.

“Young man don’t play games with me!” Timon’s baritone voice kept increasing in steps such that the last one came out as a roar. He squeezed my shoulder more and I cringed in pain.

“Rain, what kind of an adult are YOU? I thought you were mature! Any man that who keeps following women is a person who has lost direction. If you are guided by an erection, then there is nothing you will achieve. You are doomed to failure my son and if you want to go in that direction, then you have my full curse. It is a shame, I thought University education would make you wiser. Immorality will surely lead to your downfall Youngman…”

Listening to my dad utter such words to me was more painful than a cane. I felt like walking away from them, but I could not.

“You are ultimately responsible for your life or destruction…” my dad said with a grim of finality.

“I should never see you near my Emma or my house!” Timon bellowed out just to rub it in.

I headed straight to my room pushing away Wesley who wanted a breakdown of all the unfolding. I bolted the door and as I recounted every word my dad had uttered, it was a bitter pill to swallow. At that point I reached out for my cell-phone knowing that only one person would calm me down.

“Hallo,” I whispered feebly.

“Hon, what’s up?” Stella’s soothing voice came through the phone.

“It’s my dad, we argued over…..over….” what was I supposed to say?

“Tell me baby, what did your dad say to you?”

“Well it is about his old rickety vehicle, I took it out without his permission and now he is blaming me for everything!” My imaginations had come in handy.

“Don’t worry swiry, we shall one day buy our own car, just try to understand him,” Stella was all the medication I needed. She was so sweet and I was already feeling better!

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #13: The Junction!

Having smeared his name in front of the Army Man, my dad saw it fit to send me away where I would be occupied for a while. He called Uncle Sam who promised to secure an internship opportunity for me. So with a moderate pocket money, I took a Matatu to Nakuru.

Knowing the generosity of Uncle Sam, I knew it to be a safe bet to blow off half of my pocket money. And in burning up that allowance, one name came to mind. The phone was picked on the third ring.

“Swiry!” Stella shouted excitedly.

“Hi hon..I have missed you so much,”

“Me too hon..so where are you?” Stella responded with gusto.

“Well, I will be with you in 2-hours time,” Instead of alighting at Nakuru, I paid a few extra shillings to make it to Nairobi.

It was already five when I met Stella waiting for me at Kenya Cinema. We went to a restaurant upstairs for a cup of coffee, and later downstairs for a movie. Will Smith was co-starring alongside Eva Mendes in the romantic movie. He was at his best, and I envied him.

“Isn’t Will amazing?” Stella said as we strolled towards memorial park

“And the basic principles…there are none!” he is hilarious.

“My dad will kill me, it is too late,” Stella said after a while and then smiled coyly.

“The fun just started girl! I got plans for the whole night,” Stella pushed me with her index finger on my forehead and I just smiled.

Tacos had very few patrons, understandably so because it was a Tuesday and in the middle of the month. We continued to look for other venues but most clubs remained largely deserted. At that moment we took number 6 matatu to Ngara.

“What do you want?” a plump receptionist at Pumzika Lodging inquired.

“A room for the night,” I answered back. “Two rooms?” the lady asked while looking at the empty condom dispenser on the wall. I also reached for my pocket and rubbers were intact. “Nope, a single room…” I said then stared at Stella, but she was looking at the pictures on the wall.

“That would be a thousand bob,” the receptionist said as she reached for a file.

The absence of light was enough aphrodisiac for me. I reached for her cheeks and kissed them passionately. She could not resist and that is when I moved to her lips, I sucked her luscious lips again and again alternating between the lower and upper lip. As the passion intensified I stuck out my tongue to probe deeper into her mouth. She started moaning and that is when my hands started moving downstream. I had a problem unhooking her bra, but she gladly chipped in. I reached for her trousers and her knickers and gently but hurriedly removed them. I did it once, then again and again and again….in the end she feebly pushed me away. It is then that I bid her goodnight and slumped to sleep.

As I woke up, and pulled the window curtains the sun rays hit me. Stella partially opened her eyes and smiled. I hoped that smile would remain after she had faced her father but as for me I knew I had to head to Nakuru and face the benevolent but conditional Uncle Sam.

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #14: The Real Hustler!

Uncle Sam failed me on two fronts, first he failed to secure an attachment in a real engineering firm and second, when he talked of Next Generation International College, I knew that I was heading to a prestigious institution. However locating it in Town became a problem as no one knew about it. Eventually when I did find it, I was shocked.

It was a small office subdivided into three. There was a tiny front office, with a receptionist and two classes. One had three pretty old computers and another, a blackboard and a few chairs.

“Hi, I am Rain, I am looking for Mr Maina” I said to the unsmiling receptionist.

“Just wait for him, over there,” she said pointing to a metal chair then continued with her typing.

A few minutes later, Maina appeared accompanied by five students. He immediately directed the students to the classroom, and then beckoned me to the other “office”.

“How are you sir?”

“I am good, I am Maina the CEO of this college how can I help you?”

“Well I am Rain, I was sent by my Uncle Sam, he said…”

“Uh Lain, yes your uncle told me…”

“It is Rain sir,” I interrupted him.

“I just said that, well I was saying your uncle tells me that you are good with computers and you could be of use to this International College.”

When he mentioned International, I realized the irony of the statement; the college could barely sustain 3 computer students at a time and I had only come into contact with one employee, the receptionist.

“Lain so how much are you expecting at the end of the month?” he moved closer and patted my back. His breath reeked of cigarettes.

“Twenty thousand per month,” I said, not sure how he would react.

“That is quite high, you are on attachment; which basically means you will be learning while working. You see, we are not yet fully operational so let me start you at six thousand then I can monitor your progress.”

“Okay,” I knew I was not going to last there for long.

“Lain this is The Company Secletary, Jane, who is also my wife.”

“Pleasure to meet you Jane,” I said to the receptionist who grinned briefly exposing her pearl white teeth. Maina signaled me aside.

“Lain, you see light now we don’t have computer students yet and since it is the August holidays we are offering tuitions to secondary and primary students.”

“You mean those students there are secondary school students!” I could not hide my shock. “Actually one is in class eight, two in form three and two in form four. Don’t worry just give them basic stuff; Maths, English, Kiswahili, you know!”

“Where are the books? The resource materials?”

“Well as I said just give them basic stuff, I have to go Downtown to do some marketing.”

By marketing I knew he was going to place his posters on those NO POSTERS signs alongside those of strip clubs, Jam sessions reggae and the Dr. Abdallas who cure everything including runaway wives, jealousy “men problems” promotions at the workplace, ad infinitum ad nauseam. In process he risked being caught by the overzealous council askaris.

As I walked to the classroom with nothing in my hand except a piece of chalk, I did what an unprepared teacher would do. After the introductions I combined the secondary school students asked for an English textbook then flipped to questions that I knew had answers at the end. I wrote them on the blackboard and gave them an entire two hours to work on them. As for the standard eight pupil, I went and sat next to her knowing very well that writing 975653427 in words would not be a problem at all.

When later on I called Stella to explain to her my new “attachment” she was in uncontrollable laughter. But my pal Chris was not amused, he actually asked if there was need for another employee!

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #15: “Chema Chajiuza!"

Maina’s concept of marketing was actually paying off. In a week’s time there were three computer students at Next Generation International College. In fact when he asked me how he could source for a new employee, I quickly called Chris to come to Nakuru. One of the new students, Chema, had an interesting problem with computers.

Chema was slightly short, but this was countered by her perfect figure; her classic face, her pure complexion and her flawless row of snow white teeth, all too endearing. She was stunning but computers did not see how that could be translated to 1s and 0s.

“Where is the start button?” Chema inquired when I instructed her to open a word document.

“It should be at the bottom of the screen,” I replied as I monitored the other students.

“I can’t see it,” Chema replied.

“Okay let me help you.” I moved closer to her, placed my hand on top of hers as I helped her navigate the mouse on the computer screen.

Even as I moved closer to her, I was sucked up to the ambience of her cologne. I rubbed myself softly to her ponytailed hair, it felt so good inhaling the fragrance of her hair gel. “I thought Start was some button that you use a hand and not a mouse!” she said as I clicked on the Start button. “Don’t worry; soon you will be proficient with this machine. It’s Start>All Programs>Microsoft office>Microsoft Office Word,” I was actually whispering to her ear, almost biting it. Now I new why they said teaching is a noble profession!

The century old computers were taking ages to load much to my advantage. I took my time, holding her hand and hovering the cursor on the monitor several times while clicking unnecessarily on the mouse. At times I patted her back and rubbed it slowly as I repeated the instructions again and again.

“You know I am quite a slow learner so you will have to take me slowly,” she said softly then smiled, while facing me.

I cleared my throat and to show that I was the lecturer in charge, I tried out a baritone voice, “You will soon realize how computers are so easy to operate,” the voice came out like a tweet. I guess her charm was unshakable!

“So, Mr. Rain you are a computer scientist?”

“No, actually I am an engineer,”

“So how is it being an engineer?”

“Well, I would like to say that we just doing God’s work, you see God said let there be light, but he actually meant during the day only, then an electrical engineer came in and said let there be light at night too and there was light!”

“Mr. Rain, that is so cool!” she was truly impressed.

The Word Program was now open and I gave her a newspaper clip where she could begin typing. I did not know that finding ‘W’ on a keyboard could be that hard! I moved over to the other students who were already far ahead with their typing. When I took a break and went to the reception, I was surprised to find Chris there.

“Hey, Rain, long time man!”

“Yea, it’s been, how have you been?” I shook his hand several times.

“I have been good… is she a student,” Chris said pointing to Chema.

“Oh yes she is….”

“Man, her butt is her best ASSet! Now you have Stella and I got to have her!.... God I love Nakuru!” Chris was already moving in Chema’s direction.

Campus Life Good Boy Gone Bad #16: Chris versus Rain

Even though Chris was my best friend, there was one major difference between the two of us: Chris was the kind of the hunter who runs after the prey with all his strength and shoots from the hip while I was the kind who lays a trap for the prey.

“Hey girl, I am Chris and I come second to Bill Gates when it comes to computers,” Chris said. “Mhhh?” Chema replied.

“But do I say? You know the key to proficiency in a Word Program is this Ctrl key. It is the control key and you can do magic with it,” Chris blurted out. He moved closer to Chema and placed his hand on her shoulder, Chema brushed it aside politely. Chris still oozing energy continued, “If you want to open a document it’s Ctrl+O, to make it bold it’s Ctrl+B, to save the document it’s Ctrl+S and to exit the application it’s Ctrl+W. Very simple!” he exclaimed.

“Sorry, I did not get anything,” Chema said shaking her head. I almost burst out laughing.

“Chris, come over here.” Maina, shouted. Mr. Maina had assigned Chris to be the tutor for the secondary school students. On the other hand, I was responsible for the computer students and thereby interacting with Chema on a primary basis. Chris however could dump assignments to the secondary students and come to the aid of Chema in learning how to use a computer.

“Man, I am on fire for this chic,” Chris said on our lunch break. “I don’t know why she could not agree to my lunch offer.”

“Slow it down man, she ain’t feeling you at the moment,” I said.

“No, Rain you got to help me out,” Chris said then patted my back. “You are my bro, tell her how cool I am! Show her that I am the real package she is looking for.”

It was an untenable request. Chris knew that I had a girlfriend and naturally thought that I had no interest in Chema. However, my interest in Chema was growing at an alarming rate. When I walked to class that afternoon, Chema called me aside and requested for remedial classes on computer basics.

“Chema, I want you to visualize yourself like a boss,” I started.

“Like this boss who has a mean secretary just outside her office?” she inquired.

“Correct. The secretary is mean but effective. The computer is now your secretary. This thing called the desktop is like the top of your desk, the secretary allows you to place the most important stuff on your desk,” I continued. I shifted my position so that I was now facing her directly. I saw in her those trusting round white eyes; the sclera having taken over the surface of her eyes.

I knew that I wielded enormous power over her, I felt like The Man. “Email is an electronic mail which is comparable to sending your secretary with a mail to any office. This word program is like your notepad. The keyboard is your pen, you can type everything, put in bold for emphasis, align them in paragraphs for precision and so on,” I paused to gauge her attentiveness.

“That sounds so simple,” she said her dimples forming beautifully on her chubby face.

“uh well, computers are made to simplify life,”

“Mr. Rain, you are such a good teacher! I should buy you lunch,” she said.

“No, I should buy you lunch, because you are really learning so fast!”